


Screw Canon, it's Mine Now

by castiels_hairline



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, F/M, Fix-It, Happy Ending, M/M, Tags Are Hard, Team Free Will (Supernatural), Team Free Will 2.0 (Supernatural), no beta we die like lgbtq characters on spn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:21:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27745147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castiels_hairline/pseuds/castiels_hairline
Summary: Fix it fic for 15x20. Picks up after 15x19. Happy ending for Sam and Eileen and Dean and Cas. Basically a self indulgent fic of what I would have liked to see for the ending
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester
Comments: 6
Kudos: 56





	Screw Canon, it's Mine Now

**Author's Note:**

> Some stuff isn't explained well and I wasn't originally going to post it, but it can't be worse than the original ending, am i right ladies and gents?? I hope you guys enjoy it :)

“Did you find anything?” Sam asks as he falls into the seat across from Dean. His face is haggard, and it’s clear he is not happy. His eyes have dark bags underneath as if he has not slept soundly for a few days. Dean looks much the same, haggard, tired, sad. It is clear they are both attempting to put up a brave face for the other. Neither wants the other to know they’re hurting. They’ve only ever had each other. Only that’s not true, is it? They aren’t alone anymore. They’ve built a family. They have Cas. They have Eileen. They have Jack. This isn’t right. 

“No,” Dean answers curtly. He grabs the open bottle of beer that has been sitting next to him like a silent companion. Alcohol has been his most constant companion lately. Sam tries not to keep count of how many he’s had since they beat Chuck. It’s an unspoken agreement between the brothers. Sam doesn’t mention Dean’s drinking, and in return Dean doesn’t mention Sam’s refusal to leave the archives. He’s thrown himself into the lore so hard, he misses nights of sleep. Neither of them wants to think about Cas. Neither of them wants to think about Eileen. 

Miracle, the dog, whines at Dean’s side. Dean absentmindedly reaches a hand down to pet the shaggy dog. His eyes don’t leave the laptop screen, but it’s clear he’s looking through it more than he’s actually looking at it. Sam’s eyes slip to Miracle. He takes notice of the empty bottles of beer on the floor. There’s so many, so much. It’s too much. It’s all too much.

“Do you think about them?” Sam asks finally in a small voice. He hears Dean’s breath hitch almost as if he’s surprised Sam brought the topic to light so suddenly. Sam looks up at Dean. Dean’s looking at the table, not even pretending to be interested in the possible case on his laptop screen. He looks broken. As broken as he’ll allow anyway, he was never one to wear his emotions clearly for others to see. They should be happy. This isn’t right.

Dean drags his hands over his face roughly. His hands climb to his hair, and he tugs it in frustration before speaking. “Yeah, I do. I can’t stop thinking about him, Sam,” Dean admits finally. Sam isn’t sure Dean would have even said it if he hadn’t been staring down the bottle for two days straight. “Why didn’t Jack bring him back? Why didn’t I ask?” Dean asks aloud to no one in particular. Sam takes it upon himself to answer as he doesn’t think Miracle is going to offer up any answers anytime soon. 

“He wants to be hands off,” Sam answers. The resignation is clear in his voice. “He wants to be different than Chuck.”

“At least Chuck brought Cas back,” Dean snaps.

Sam can’t argue with that. 

“Have you tried calling Eileen?” Dean asks in a gentler tone. He regrets snapping at Sam, but he can’t help it. He’s angry. He knows he’s more than his anger. Cas made sure he knew that. Cas. How is this fair to Cas. Always happy to bleed for the Winchester. And he did. Too many times.

Sam doesn’t answer. Instead, he pulls a phone out of his pocket and places it, screen up, on the table. It’s Eileen’s. Dean looks at it. He didn’t know Sam had held onto it. Dean nods in understanding. “I keep wanting to go by her house,” Sam says. Dean’s eyes flicker up from the phone and focus on Sam. 

“Why haven’t you?” Dean asks. His eyes are so tired. They look almost gray. He isn’t doing well. He wouldn’t like to know Sam is worrying about him. He wants to be strong for his brother. He wants to be strong so his brother doesn’t have to be. 

Sam doesn’t want to say anything that will further upset Dean. “I’m worried she won’t be there.” Sam decides is a safe answer. It’s true in part. She had died before, but Chuck brought her back as part of his plan. He wasn’t sure if Jack had resurrected her. She hadn’t called him. Hadn’t reached out. He’s worried she won’t be there, and he’s not sure he’ll be able to handle it if she’s not. But he’s worried about Dean as well. He doesn’t want to leave him alone. Sam doesn’t want to be left alone too much either. 

Dean looks at him for a long moment. He raises a bottle to his lips and takes a long swig. He puts the bottle back down, closes his laptop and stands up. “I guess we’d better find out then, huh?” He says. He’s forcing optimism into his voice. Sam doesn’t point it out. 

It’s a short car ride. Sam drives, he knows Dean isn’t in the best state to do it. Even if he does know the car and road like the back of his hand. Better than the back of his hand. They arrive at Eileen’s house. The lights are on. Sam can’t get out of the car fast enough. They’ve barely pulled to full stop before he’s practically throwing himself out of the car. He’s at the door faster than Dean can blink. He recognizes the anxiety in Sam’s movements. Dean is filled with more hope and fear in that moment than he has been in days. Sam feels that and more and Eileen opens the door. She looks relieved, Sam looks more so. Dean thinks he can hear Sam’s muffled sobs as he pulls Eileen into his arms and buries his face in her shoulder. Dean feels his eyes water and looks away. 

Sam has never hugged anyone tighter. He’s crying. He knows he is, but he doesn’t care. All that matters is he has Eileen. She’s okay, she’s safe, and she’s probably confused. Sam pulls her as close to his body as he can. Her brown hair is tucked under his chin, and her arms are wrapped around his back. He wishes he had been able to hold her like this before she had been taken. He makes a vow to never let her go again. 

Eileen comes back to the bunker with them. It’s not a permanent living situation, but they don’t need permanent. They just need each other. They just need the now. They can worry about forever later. They have time, and they have each other. 

Sam is still crying when he climbs back into the car. Dean doesn’t mention it. He looks happier. Dean doesn’t mention that either, but he likes to see his little brother look like he’s found a reason to live again. Dean looks out the window and thinks of Cas. If Sam can find happiness, surely he can find happiness as well. Right?

For the first time in days, Sam goes to sleep at a reasonable hour and wakes up early. He makes breakfast. The radio is on. The stove is on. The lights are on. Eileen is barefoot in the kitchen. The bunker feels alive again, at least a little bit. Sam is still hurting. Dean can see that. It’s not as obvious as it had been the day before, but Dean can tell he’s still thinking about the others they’ve lost. He’s thinking about Cas. He’s thinking about Jack. Dean is too. 

“I miss Cas,” Dean sighs. He sounds resigned. He wishes he’d had the chance to talk to him before he had been taken by the Empty. He hadn’t been able to process his words at the time, but he’s ready now. And now he doesn’t know if he’ll ever have the chance to speak to him again. It hurts.

Sam stops what he’s doing at the stove. Eileen takes notice and takes the spatula from Sam to finish scrambling the eggs. They share a loving and knowing glance. Dean looks away. He’s looking at the table, but his gaze is somewhere else. 

Sam sits across from him. “We’ll get him back.” Sam sounds certain. “We just got Eileen back. That’s a win, man. We will find a way to bring Cas back.” Dean deserves to be happy. If Cas is his happiness, Sam will fight tooth and nail to get to him. Castiel deserves to be happy as well. He knows about his deal with the Empty. He knows about Cas’ confession to Dean. Dean had told him after Jack had left. He hasn’t told Sam how he feels about Castiel, but Sam already knows. 

Dean looks up at Sam. His eyes are red and shining. Sam clenches his jaw. He hates to see his brother so upset. He wants to celebrate having Eileen back, but it doesn’t feel right with Cas still in the Empty. “How?” Dean asks. His voice sounds dangerously close to breaking. “What if he’s gone for good, and he thinks I don’t--” He cuts himself. A muscle twitches as he clenches his jaw. He swallows. Sam reaches across the table and grabs Dean’s hand. His grip is strong. He will hold Dean together piece by piece if he has to. They will get their happy endings. This isn’t right. All this fighting, and this is the grand prize? No, they will get Cas back, and they will be happy. Sam is sure of it. 

“We’ll ask Jack. I’ll dig into the lore about the Empty.” Sam’s voice is strong. He sounds confident. Dean looks at him. Still no tears have fallen from his eyes. Sam almost thinks he’s holding it together. He almost thinks he’s managing. But he knows Dean is just bottling up his emotions the way he always does. He’ll bottle them up, and then they’ll explode. He’s never been the best at handling his emotions. 

“Jack wants to be hands off,” Dean reminds him. “And we’ve been through the lore, there’s not much.”

“Then I’ll find Chuck and beat the answers out of him,” Sam states. “Someone has to know something.” If Chuck had been able to bring back Lucifer, surely God must be able to bring back other angels. Jack must have some hold over the Empty. 

Dean shakes his head. He’s dangerously close to losing hope all together. 

“Jack can’t just leave Cas in the Empty. Let’s call him.” Dean looks unconvinced. “If he doesn’t answer, we’ll find another way. But it doesn’t hurt to try,” Sam presses. Dean can’t argue with that, but calling Jack feels too easy. It feels too easy, but it's filling him with hope. He doesn’t want to feel this hope so strongly and then have it leave him so suddenly. Because if he feels close to getting Cas back and it falls through, it’ll be just like losing him again. Dean doesn’t want to suffer that loss again, and definitely not so soon. 

Sam closes his eyes and bows his head. It's been a long time since he’s prayed. He’s not entirely sure what to say, but he had to try for Dean. He has to try for Castiel.

“Jack, we need to talk about Castiel,” he starts. “We want to save him. We want to bring him back, but we don’t really know where to start. If you could help out, even just a little bit, we’d be grateful.” He peeks his eyes open, searching for Jack. Dean’s eyes are closed as well. His head bowed. Eileen has taken the eggs off the stove. She’s leaning against the counter, observing the two brothers. She’s ready to offer Sam any support he needs at that moment. She knows Sam would do the same for her without a moment of hesitation. 

“Please, Jack,” Dean whispers. His voice is small and pleading. Sam hates it. He hates seeing his older brother like this. This isn’t right. What’s the point of free will and writing their own stories if they can’t be with the people they love the most?

“Sam, Dean.” Jack appears in the kitchen in front of the brothers. He still has the white jacket on. Sam knows he’s young, but God, he’s just a kid. 

Dean jumps to his feet in one motion. “Can you bring Cas back?” he asks immediately. There’s more life in his voice than Sam has heard for the past few days. Eileen is at Sam’s side. Her hand finds his and she laces their fingers together. 

Jack purses his lips together. “I can’t,” he answers. Dean opens his mouth to argue, but Jack puts up a hand before he can get a word out. “But you can.” Dean’s eyebrows furrow in confusion. Sam wears a look of confusion on his face as well. 

As an explanation, Jack snaps and a crack in the air appears. The crack looks nearly identical to the portal to the apocalypse world. Dean’s eyes dart to the portal and then back to Jack. “He’s in there?” he asks. His voice is uncertain, but steady. 

“He is,” Jack answers. He has a smile on his face. 

Sam blinks a few times. “So what? We just walk in and grab Cas?” he asks. “Is it dangerous? Should we grab supplies?”

Before he can get an answer, Dean is already walking through the portal. 

Jack looks at Sam and Eileen. “They will be fine,” he assures them. He looks unconcerned, at peace even, and he sounds certain. Sam trusts him. He trusts in the love Jack has for Dean and Castiel. He trusts in the love Jack has for him. He nods at Jack, wordlessly, and looks at the portal. 

The Empty is dark. It’s a dumb observation, but it’s the first thing Dean notices. The second thing he notices is Cas. He’s laying on the ground, and he’s not moving. Dean’s feet have a mind of their own as he runs to Cas. He can feel tears welling up in his eyes, he pays them no mind. He’s on his knees at Cas’ side in an instant. He takes Cas’ face in his hands. He’s still not moving. 

“Cas?” he whispers. His voice is breaking, but he can’t stop it. He’s so close. He’s so close, this has to be worth it. Cas is worth it. “Cas?!”

Dean grabs his shoulders and pulls him into a hug. He’s limp, but he’s here, and that’s more than Dean’s had for days. He holds him as close as he can and as tight as he can. His body is shaking and he thinks he’s crying, but all that matters is Cas is in front of him. He just feels Cas’ body against his own. He wonders how long this was a possibility. How long could they have had this? How long had Cas loved him? How long has he loved Cas?

He can’t stand the thought that it was over before they even had a chance to explore what it could have been. He’s so full of regret. He regrets not appreciating Cas as much as he should have. He regrets never telling him he loved him. “Please,” he begs. “Please don’t leave me.” The tears are running down his face, but he doesn’t care about that. “I need you. You’re family. I know it’s too late to say it. I should have said it sooner, but I love you,” he says. He doesn’t say it lightly. He doesn’t use the word “love” often, but he means it. He has never meant it more. 

“Dean?”

“Cas?” Dean pulls back just enough to look at Cas’ face. His eyes are open. His eyes are blue. He looks confused. “Cas.” he confirms. Dean sighs a breath of relief. He can feel a small amount of tension leave his body. He pulls Cas back into the hug. Cas’ arms wrap around him too. Dean’s breath comes out shaky as he laughs and cries into Cas’ shoulder. 

“It’s not too late to say it,” Cas says with his face pushed against Dean’s chest. “I’ve waited a very long time for you, Dean.” Cas pulls back. Dean aches at the loss of touch. Cas looks into his eyes. Dean thinks back to just before he was taken by the Empty. He remembers the sincerity in which Cas had told him he loved him. He’s so open, and vulnerable, and full of love. Dean is still in shock over how someone could be so full of love for him. Castiel, an angel, had looked at Dean as a broken soul in hell, and yet somehow, he had fallen in love with him. Dean was mystified and wonderstruck. “I would wait as long as you need,” Cas assures him. Dean looks at his face, so full of love and loyalty, and he knows he means it. 

But Dean doesn’t need time. He’s had more than enough time over the past few days. He takes one last lingering look over Cas’ face and then pulls him in for a kiss. His hands are clenched into fists in Cas’ trench coat. He can’t let go, he doesn’t want to let go. Cas is smiling into the kiss, but Dean can’t seem to stop crying. This time he knows it’s tears of joy rather than tears of sorrow. 

“I love you,” Dean whispers as he pulls away from the kiss. “You can have me, Cas. As long as you want me, you can have me.”

Cas smiles as he hears the words he thought he would never hear from Dean Winchester.

The portal Jack opened begins to flicker. Dean is pretty sure it’s just a reminder they shouldn’t waste time in the Empty. He rises to his feet and pulls Cas up with him. With their hands intertwined, the walk out of the Empty together. 

The kitchen is just how he left it. Sam and Eileen standing between the table and the stove, and Jack standing next to the portal. Cas doesn’t hesitate to pull Jack into a hug. 

“I knew you would bring paradise, Jack. Your mother would be so proud.” Cas hugs him tighter. Jack looks surprised for a moment before hugging him back. “I’m proud of you as well.” Cas finally pulls away. 

Jack looks content. He looks at peace. “The Empty won’t bother you any longer,” he declares proudly. He purses his lips together for a moment. “I should let you know the Empty agreed to let you go only if you gave up your grace and became human, Cas.” Castiel doesn’t look surprised. Sam, Dean, and Eileen do. “When you walked through the portal, your choice was finalized,” Jack explained. 

Cas puts a fatherly hand on Jack’s shoulder. “I felt it when I passed through. I would make the same choice over again. Thank you, Jack, for the chance at life you’ve given me.” His gaze finds Dean’s. It’s so soft, so intimate, so personal, Sam and Eileen look away before sharing a look of their own. 

“I’ll miss you, Castiel,” Jack sounds sad at the thought of leaving him. At the thought of leaving them. He wants to be a better god than Chuck. He wants to be hands off, but he wants his family. 

“And I you. Are you sure you can’t visit? Not even every now and then?” Cas asks. Jack takes a breath and opens his mouth like he’s about to answer, but the words die in his throat. He closes his mouth and thinks for a moment. 

“I have some things to take care of, but I’ll try,” Jack promises with a smile. Jack and Castiel share a long look. They don’t know when they’ll see each other again, but at least there’s hope. Castiel wants nothing more than for his family to be happy, Jack included. He hopes he will be able to accomplish everything he seeks to, and he hopes he will be able to co exist with Amara. But he mostly hopes Jack will be able to reach out to him, Sam or Dean if he needs help. He doesn’t want Jack to have to undergo anything alone. He wants him to be able to rely on his family. 

And then Jack is gone. And Castiel, Eileen and the Winchesters are alone in the bunker kitchen. For the first time since as long as they can remember, they finally feel like they have a real shot at happiness. Whatever they decide happiness is for them. This is right. This is fair. This is the ending they deserve. They deserve a shot at whatever they choose. For the first time in a long time, everything feels right. There is hope for Eileen. There is hope for Castiel. There is hope for Sam and Dean Winchester. 

Happiness for Sam and Eileen turns out to be a combination of hunting and regular life. They balance it well. They move into Eileen’s house. Sam makes breakfast in the mornings. He still answers the old hunting phones. They don’t take many jobs unless they’re close by, but he does offer help to any hunter in the area. Sam takes as many books from the bunker to Eileen’s house as he can carry. He combs through the lore often, and when he finishes those books, he takes them back to the bunker and returns with even more. He tries to learn as much as he can and teaches as many hunters everything he can. Hunters eventually learn to call Sam if they have a case they can’t figure out. So far, he hasn’t let any of them down. 

Happiness for Dean and Castiel is much the same. They open a bar. Dean drinks a healthy amount, Cas is sure to keep an eye on that. Not much changes with their relationship. Sam jokes they had already acted like an old married couple, now they were just an official couple. Much like the Harvelle’s Roadhouse, the bar was a common place for hunters to gather and rest. Dean and Castiel are happy to help out in any way they can. Dean tries to hunt less and instead does simple work around the bar. He and Castiel have a house not too far away. They keep Miracle the dog. Dean still drives the impala. Castiel still wears the trench coat. They still work an occasional case, but Dean mostly just enjoys regaling new hunters with tales of his great feats. Cas notices his exaggerations, but he never calls them out. It's hard to argue with the man who killed Hitler, afterall.

Sam and Dean still meet up on the major holidays. Christmas is spent at Sam and Eileen’s house. Jack visits every Christmas. Amara shows up occasionally too, but she prefers to keep to herself. The last they had heard, she was celebrating Christmas in Hawaii under the sun with a drink in one hand and a book in the other. Sam and Eileen decorate the tree and wear sweaters. Cas and Dean also break out the Christmas sweaters. Castiel brings a sweater for Jack as well. They all exchange gifts and celebrate surviving another year. Thanksgiving is spent at Dean and Castiel’s house. They go all out. They set the table and spend all day cooking. Football is on the tv, but none of them pay much attention to it. They just sit at the table and catch up. They laugh and joke and celebrate being around each other. They celebrate the family they’ve built around them and the free will they’ve fought so hard to earn. They are happy.


End file.
